Many kinds of problems exist in a marriage. Putting more effort in your marriage as compared to your partner is a common problem. Actually giving too much in a marriage is not a bad thing. But the situation becomes worst when giving too much in your marriage hurt you and leaves you in a one-sided relationship.
Being a giving person all the time can lead you to frustration and sometimes your partner becomes unbearable for you.
Everyone has different needs and problem like giving too much arises when you think that your partner has same need as yours. To avoid such problems don’t rush into being a giving person all the time instead focus on their cues and find out what they actually need.
People often think that they can change a person by giving too much but this thing works only in rare cases. Instead of being a giving person all the time ask your partner about their needs and also tell them directly about yours.
If only a single partner is getting attention and emotional support all the time then your relation is one-sided. Be honest with yourself and make effort for yourself to enjoy equal right in your marriage.
Here are some signs which can help you to figure out that you are giving so much in your relationship. Read them carefully and judge where you stand in your marriage and how you can improve your position your marriage.
If you are a giving person in your relationship your body also feels it. Soon your body stops being tired as a giving person and you lose emotional resilience and you end up being an emotional vampire.
If someone is not interested in make efforts for their marriage. They don’t integrate their partner in their life. They don’t want you meet with the people that are important for them like their parents, friends, and family. They don’t tell you about the thing that matter to them a lot. They don’t make future plans with you.
Everyone is busy in his life, but compromise is the key of happy relationship. If someone is willing to see you only, when it is feasible for them and wants you to be fit in their schedule. You always find time for them from your busy schedule, but they always ignore your needs when it doesn’t fit with their schedule. Then it is an obvious sign that you are less important for your partner and you might end up being in a one-sided relationship.
A relationship in which you have to do all the emotional and physical work is a relationship is a relationship in which you are a person who is putting more effort to save the relationship. An emotionally immature partner wants you to do everything alone. You have to handle every mess with them; you have to resolve every dispute and to do every task for them. You may ask them many times to do something and they won’t pay attention to you and you might end up being guilty and shamed.
Nobody is perfect in this world everyone can do the mistakes and they should be open to criticism and listening to other with peace. If your partner did something wrong and when you talk about the issue they become defensive it means they are taking advantage of your love and will keep repeating their mistake. Tell your partner that how it feels without going into an argument which can make them defensive and solve the issue.
If your partner don’t listen to you and put blame of everything on you then it means that your partner is not a giving person at all and using you and your emotions as a dumping ground. This is really unfair. Speak up for yourself and ask them to consider about you and your emotions. Be strong and honest with yourself. Don’t let them play with your feelings.
Whether it is about spending time together, meeting with your family or hanging out with your friends, if you want your partner to be there for you for the sake of your happiness, your partner refuse to do so because they have some other things to work on. Then you need to talk to your partner about it. It is really difficult to admit that you are the only one who is putting effort into your marriage. But try to be honest with yourself. Ask your partner about it and move on and go find someone who values you instead of using you like a puppet.
If you always make plan and your partner shows no interest in making plan to spend some time together. And they always ignore you when you ask them why they don’t take interest in making plans together. Then it means that you are the only one who is interested to keep going in your relationship.
If are always desperate to see your partner and they does not care about it. They are always busy with friends and family. Always tell you that they don’t have time to see you. Which make you more desperate toward them then you are definitely in a relationship where your partner really doesn’t want to understand your feelings at all.
You partner never tries to please you with surprises, never initiate communication or never wish you good luck about the things which are really special for you. If you keep waiting that they will realize that what make you happy or unhappy. But they really don’t care about what is happening in your life. They keep going in their life normally even you are hitting a storm in yours, then your relationship can be very dangerous for you emotionally as you are the one who will end up being in one-sided relationship.